How to learn effectively from a feedback
When it comes to receiving feedback it is not easy to turn it into a learning experience if we are not ready to. Sometimes a negative feedback can be very destructive and disappointing. A lot of investigations show that good and constructive feedback can help growing personally and should be used as personnel tool.
How can we learn effectively from a feedback? It doesn’t matter if it’s written or an oral one, keep these points in your head next time you have been “feedbacked”.
- Who said/wrote it?
Sometimes it’s not worth keeping thinking over it if the person who gave you a “strong” feedback is jealous or envious of you / about your position. You should not forget it though as it could be a helpful hint. Anyway: observe the position and experiences of who gave you the feedback and try to see and understand his/her point of view. Understanding others’ positions helps us in our personal development as we have to deal with different people at our workplace and in our daily life and we can learn from their experience.
- Have you already heard it?
If it is not the first time you heard that particular feedback, there could be something right about it. In many presentation workshops I hear many participants reporting that the feedback they hear from me is the same one (or similar) they heard already from their boss or colleagues. The “right” impression come across from different people, you should be aware of these repetitions.
- What went wrong/right? Look for your own explanation.
Try to explain to yourself what happened and why you got that kind of feedback. Does it have to do with your own personality? Or maybe you were nervous in that particular situation? Or you were not really well prepared? It doesn’t matter if we are talking about a positive or negative feedback: understanding and analyzing the situation, the context and your behavior make you more successful next time. Learning from your own experience means to be able to reflect over it first, so that you can memorize it and analyze it and get the best out of it next time.
- What can you do now or next time you are in the same situation?
Now that you have analyzed and understood the situation you can learn how to control it next time. First step: know exactly WHAT you want to change in that particular situation next time you are involved in it. Describe with one sentence your behavior in a positive way like for example “In my next presentation I will speak more slowly and will pay attention to my audience” or “In the next meeting I will be more assertive” and so on. Second step: HOW you want to change it exactly. Be sure of the actions you can take in order to change your behavior in that particular situation and be aware of the consequences.
In this sense feedback can be turned into a positive experience and we all should be thankful for it if it can help us in our personal development. How to give good and constructive feedback with respect and empathy is another story though.